WELCOME
Hello.
You might have found your way here because something inside you knows: Life looks fine on the outside, but inside, it’s not adding up.
You have the job. The relationships. The home. The “good enough life.”
And yet — there’s an ache you can’t shake.
That ache has a name.
I call it Subtle Abandonment — the lingering impact of a childhood where the basics were met, but your inner world wasn’t.
NAMING IT
Subtle Abandonment is not about whether your parents stayed together, divorced, or left entirely.
It’s about whether you were truly seen, heard, and understood — and how the absence of that shaped your sense of safety, belonging, and self-worth.
When the basics are covered, these quiet wounds can be harder to name — and easier to dismiss. That’s why so many people downplay their experience:
“Other people had it worse.”
“I should be grateful.”
“It wasn’t that bad.”
But “not that bad” doesn’t mean “no impact.”
And if you’ve been carrying that silent ache into adulthood, it’s worth tending to.
Beyond the individual
Most conversations about emotional neglect stop with the individual.
In my work, we go further — tracing how this absence is passed down through generations, even when each generation is “doing better” than the last.
Subtle Abandonment shapes how families respond to trauma — whether it’s divorce, death, abuse, or a parent leaving.
When one caregiver is gone or emotionally unavailable, the remaining family often shifts into survival mode, keeping life running while emotional presence fades even further.
In some families, abuse is minimized or dismissed, especially when the lineage has taught them that “worse things happen to other people” or “you should be grateful for what you have.”
This can leave the child carrying not only the original hurt, but also the silence that followed.
The Lens We Use
In Second Generation Work™, we look at the full picture — the quiet absence in everyday life and the way that absence magnifies the impact of bigger ruptures.
This is where true repair begins.
And now, as an adult, you may find yourself living a “good enough” life but still feeling disconnected from yourself, unsure why contentment always seems just out of reach.
Where to Begin
Choose the path that resonates most right now:
Reclaiming Your Voice – My signature program for untangling old conditioning and finding the courage to speak and live from your truth. (Start here if you’re curious about healing Subtle Abandonment and reclaiming your sense of self.)
Therapy (NJ) – For deeper, one-on-one work if you’re located in New Jersey.
Second Generation Leadership™ – For leaders and changemakers ready to shift inherited patterns while shaping healthier culture.